Here's the third and final installment of tips to keep your relationship thriving as you raise your children, excerpted from my booklet, 52 Tips for a Magical Marriage After Your Child Is Born. If you missed my first two posts, take another look here.
1. Say I love you and Thank you every day. As often as you say I love you to your child, it's just as critical to remember to say it to your partner every single day. A heartfelt thank you goes a long way in letting your partner know you appreciate him or her. Say thank you for the smallest acts of kindness and those that are routine.
I know this seems very obvious. But the fact of the matter is it's very easy to get caught up in all that's involved with raising a family and shower all your love and attention onto your child or children leaving your partner out of theequation.
One particular afternoon I threw together a simple turkey sandwich for my husband to take on a road trip with him. A couple of hours later I gotthe most loving call thanking me for the sandwich, telling me how delicious it was and how much he appreciated my effort. I can't tell you how much that call meant to me and it made me want to do more for him.
2. Greet your partner with love. Be his or her lover first as your partner steps through the door after a long day at work. Smile. Share a hug and a kiss.
In the beginning of being a new mom I used to throw the baby at my husband when he got home from work. I barely said hello and rarely gave him a kiss. All I cared about was getting a breather from our son. Eventually, my husband told me that he really needed to be greeted by me in a way that let him know I was glad he was home other than just to relieve me of baby duties. I honored his request by giving him kisses and hugs first and I also decided to give him time to transition from work mode to home. After doing this he told me he looked forward to coming home so much more than before and made an effort to get home as early as possible so he could relieve me.
3. Connect before falling asleep. Share at least one reason why you love each other as you lay in bed. Then cuddle up for a good night's sleep.
My husband and I started doing this when we had very little time with each other during any given day. After a while it became our norm because it reconnected us instantly and gave us the opportunity to remember why we chose to be with each other.
4. Keep kissing. Wait before pulling away if you're in the middle of a passionate kiss and your child starts crying. Take a moment to finish. Look into each other's eyes and then go check on your bundle of joy, together.
5. Watch your child together as he or she sleeps. You are the only people in the Universe who could have given life to this person. Knowing how much you love your little miracle tell each other how grateful you are to have found one another and formed this family.
It's been a pleasure having the opportunity to share some of my tips with you. I encourage you to implement them. If you'd like all 52 tips to keep your marriage going strong, you can purchase the booklet here at www.parentsinlove.com.
If you feel you need more support beyond the tips booklet please feel free to get in touch with me to see if some personal coaching would serve you. I can be reached at 310-375-4800 or Linda@ParentsInLove.com.
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Parenting Your Relationship